A Little Serving of Perspective

What I find most interesting about connecting with someone new, is what they bring to the table.  I believe people come into our lives for a reason.  Sometimes they stay, sometimes they go. As I reflect on different experiences, I can identify people who have had the most impact on me, good or bad.  I tend to observe and listen because it is easy to understand a person’s strengths, fears, weaknesses, interests, values in just a brief conversation.  The words a person speaks and the energy they give off can be very telling and informative.  I also find one’s eyes speak volumes – look into someone’s eyes when speaking and you will be surprised what you learn.  It can help you get to know someone even if it means run for the hills!  I actually find it interesting when someone says, “How did you know that about me?”

The thing driving my thoughts are the words shared with me last night (and I paraphrase), “Impulsive is a good thing.  Life is too short.”  The person who said this to me has a fascinating joie de vivre and approach to life that shows experience, charisma and knowledge. I have been observing and learning. I find myself quite curious given people around you are supposed to be your mirrors.  I am interested to see what else I will learn and what new things I will see in myself and those around me.

I have had “life is too short” on my mind all day today. It was bubbling on the back burner of my brain along the lines of, “If I got hit by a bus today, the best thing that happened was the lunch I made.”  Ok, that is an extreme exaggeration but I had a serving of perspective today.  Life is too short makes me think of something I wrote previously about taking a leap of faith. It is more likely to go well than not. (The person who said life is too short gives very little thought to a leap of faith, it is just second nature…because life is too short).  This also makes me think of people with whom I no longer have contact.  When someone in your life makes you feel like you are constantly pushing a ton of bricks uphill in a wheelbarrow, it is refreshing to leave the person and the wheelbarrow at the bottom of the hill.  What is the point of doing something that is too much effort and involves minimal reward, happiness, fun? How is that a good use of time or energy?  I try to show my appreciation for others and enjoy myself wherever I am or whatever I am doing..within reason!  Sometimes I have to check myself and shift my thoughts.

I feel like I am bouncing around and am unsure how to wrap us this post.  I will just do it abruptly.  Think about what you are doing today.  Is there something you would look back on (if you were hypothetically hit by a bus), and say, “Life was short, why did I do it that way or why did I say that way or why did I do or say nothing at all?”  A simple mindset change can set a new course or open up new opportunity.  

 

Take the Leap

How does one find their purpose?  Does each person know their purpose or do we have to follow clues to find it?  Maybe some have one purpose and others have multiple?  The majority of my hours each work day are spent at my office or with clients; yet I know in my gut my purpose in life is something other than my day job.  When I was 25 years old I was certain I would work in my current industry for the rest of my life.  I had aspirations to be a seasoned executive and that idea now seems like history to me.   I am grateful for my current job and appreciate all I have learned over the years.  I have more experience and more exposure and truth be told, there is something else I would like to do.  The “What” is in its fledgling stage as I try to frame and pin it down.  The “What” started nipping at my heels about 2 years ago so I started to pay attention.

I have been talking to people I encounter about their career choices.  My question is usually, ‘Do you work in this area’ and it usually leads to a description of where the person works and what they do.  I am learning people with a passion have usually identified their purpose or have discovered what they really want to be doing.  For some this translates into a hobby and for others a side job.  I find I am running into more and more people who have changed it up completely and fall into the leap of faith category. Each time I hear ‘it was a leap of faith’, my radar goes up.  There is much to learn from the people who say this as they have made great changes or uprooted everything in spite of the unknown and risks.   Those I have spoken with say what they do feels like a hobby and they can spend endless hours working on their projects and towards goals. Most say it can be challenging when you take a leap of faith; yet somehow the pieces fall into place.  Just recently, I saw a friend who gave up her job in sales to go into a completely new line of work and she is very content.  She did say her new life is not always ‘peaches and cream’ and she has no regrets.  She moved to the west coast and is learning a specific trade, scrapes by and is very happy.  Another friend decided he was not cut out for corporate America soon after college, started his own business, and has been driven since.  He said if a project never comes to fruition, he rarely gets discouraged because there are always new opportunities to focus on.  He noted his income sometimes fluctuates and it makes him worry, but he always keeps going.  I find the leap of faith people think about the next step instead of letting frustration or fear take over when something does not work out as planned.  I find when someone is doing what “feels” right he or she is usually excited to talk about their work and their learnings and experiences.  Those learnings and experiences can often be carried forward to the next thing.

When I hear leap of faith in a person’s story, it makes me feel as though it is a story intended for me to hear.  It makes me wonder when I will put myself in a position to look over the edge and say, ‘Ok now is the time.’ Predictability has always been very important to me as relates to my full time job.  I suppose this is indicative of my responsible, pragmatic side.  My paycheck is a consistent as is my business and my client base. It feels more like a means to an end versus something I jump out of bed for every day.  Though consistency and predictability are good, perhaps I need to find a better balance of being a risk taker without fear.  I am unsure if fear holds me back or if it is matter of timing or something else. How do I plant my feet firmly on the path to my purpose?  I may be moving the right direction right now and need to give myself more credit.  I do know one thing. I want to be the person who says, “I was working in a cubicle and one day decided I had an opportunity I was unable to pass up.  I took a leap of faith and I never looked back.”

A Mind of Its Own

What does it mean when someone says, ‘Have faith in the process’? Does it mean just go with the flow?  Does it mean be patient?   It is so hard to be patient when events in life are outside your control or when the what to do next seems unclear.  I have so many things rolling around my head these days and often find myself wondering when my brain is going to take a break.  Figuring out one’s purpose or relationships or career or where to live or anything “big” in life can be elusive,  challenging and perplexing at times.  I keep reading things that implicitly or explicitly state ‘have faith in the process.’  Have faith in the process of making yourself crazy trying to solve puzzles for which pieces appear to be missing?  Or  does it mean just stop thinking and see what happens.  When I try to stop thinking about something, I find it to be an exercise in futility.  I would love it if my brain had a delete button for some things; but alas, as a human, the brain can work overtime and springs things upon us whether we like it or not.  If it means go do something, what do you do when you are unsure what to do?

The trigger for much of what goes on in my brain is how I feel about the things rolling around in my head.  My brain used to take care of everything.  If someone asked how I felt, I would reply with ‘I think….’ and never ‘I feel…’.  I used to be able to compartmentalize things in my life. Put it in a mental box, tie a bow around it, and go about my business.  I am unsure when my brain was pushed out of the driver seat and forced to work alongside feelings and intuition but it happened.  

Since my brain had to to reckon with feelings and intuition, other things have come to light.  I have been inspired to be more creative. It may sound unusual and I felt it was odd at first, then I started to just go with the flow. I went out and bought watercolor paints and brushes and started painting.  I used to love be creative and artistic and when I walked into an art store last summer, I was in awe.  All I could FEEL was ‘Whoa!!! There is so much I can do in here!’  I quite enjoy painting with watercolors and drawing among other things.  I realized I had put my creative self on a shelf many years ago and had forgotten about it.  I would guess most people would be surprised to find out I have a creative side at this point in my life.

I also started to write in the last several months. I used to write and illustrate short books when I was a kid.  I have translated that into a personal blog, this blog, and a few notebooks   There are times when I just need to write whatever is top of mind.  It is rarely creative whimsical writing and often about something that struck a nerve in a good way or a bad way or a curious way.  

I guess going back to painting and writing are cases of me just going with the flow.  Doing rather than questioning; though I must admit sometimes I am unsure of why or what.  Maybe I just had faith in the process of dusting off my creative side and there is more to come.

Are you a thinker or a feeler?

Stepping Out On To The Limb

Have you ever had an idea or something you have wanted to do and thought, “Am I crazy?”  It is times like these when you need moral support or someone or some people or some thing other worldly to reassure you.  I have friends who have heard my ideas or who have worked with me and said, ‘Now that I know what you can do, I am going to push you to do this for others.’  I feel like I have been thrown in the deep end of the pool and I have no choice but to swim.  I never sink.

I like stability and predictability in my life; yet I have the desire to go against the grain, my own grain.  I am the person who puts limitations on me.  I am the person who tells me it is impossible or I am unable to do something.  I usually prove myself wrong as I accomplish most anything on which I focus my energy.  I have such an internal struggle going on right now.  I feel like a cliche movie scene is running in my head.  One little version of myself sitting on my left shoulder telling me to let go of  pragmatism and take a brand new, unpaved path. Have faith, believe and trust in your ability.  One little version of my standing on my right should, hands on her hips telling me to stop being impractical, predictability is good for me.  Why upset the apple cart?

I am learning my fear of upsetting the apple cart is my biggest obstacle.  I learned many years ago, fear is generally what prevents people from following their path and their dreams whether related to education, career, love, relationships.  Fear is what prevents achievement, if one allows it to do so.  It is time to leave the comfort of what is known and what is predictable and to start venturing out onto limbs to see if I fly or if the limb breaks.  If I throw the spaghetti up on the wall and it sticks, I will reap the rewards.  If it falls off the wall, then I will find something else to throw up against the wall.

If I go with my gut and stop listening to the negative thoughts it my head about what I can or cannot do, I suspect I will find myself surprised somewhere down the line.  If I open myself up to things I have from which I have shielded myself, I am sure I will find new perspective and greater opportunity in all aspects of my life.

What is your biggest internal struggle?

 

Tune In and See For Yourself

How many times have you ignored your instincts?  You know the little voice that tells you something and you dismiss it.  The gut feeling that says yes; or it says no and you do the opposite.  How many times have you pretended to hear nothing, only to find had you listened, your day would have gone much differently?  For me, it always results in a learning experience.

I have been trying to “listen” better which means when that little voice is chirping, I try to follow it.  This morning, I ignored the chirping and sure enough, my day turned into a circus as a result of one fleeting moment.  It was a “so this is happening” kind of day and then “how do I get out this awkward situation” set in.  There are days when I listen and there are days when I say, “nahhhhh”.  I need less of the latter and more of the former.  Admittedly, I am getting much better at tuning in and listening, however, everything can always be improved!

Although my day was quite a circus, I was reminded of my ability to tap dance and just totally wing it.  It comes in very handy when things go off the rails as I always manage to surprise myself.  Come up with an impromptu plan “B” and see what happens and just go with the flow.  You have to be able to do it in life and plow ahead. And in these moments, I just tell the truth and see what happens. A level head and honesty takes a person far in life, in my opinion.

How many times have you said ‘My gut was telling me…’ and you either listened or made another choice?